Swipe Right on These Literary Characters: Eight You Might Want to Consider

[A Note to readers who subscribe to this blog, you may want to open this post from the link. This post contains heavy formatting and might look better if opened from the link in your e-mail]

Daisy Miller:

Reason to Swipe Right: She loves to flirt in an 1870’s kind of way but inside she is as pure as freshly fallen snow.

Why You Might Want to Swipe Left: You would never know it from the phrases she utters like, “I have never allowed a gentleman to dictate to me, or to interfere with anything I do.” And: “Oh my gosh, I just got Roman Fever from staying out after dark with a man at the Colosseum, I’m prob’ly going to die in a few days.”

Find Her on Instagram: @DaisyfromSchenectady

Malcolm Gladwell

Reason to Swipe Right: He popularized that the idea that if you do anything for 10,000 hours you become an expert, so hopefully he extends that belief to all areas of his life.

Why You Might Want to Swipe Left:  If you rave about him to your most know-it-all friends, they will tell you that he is reductive.  They will say he is not academic but a journalist and he had no place popularizing the over-simplified generalizations that he makes.  They will recommend that you spend more time reading The New Republic.

Find Him on Instagram : @blinkthepowerofknowingyourheartbaby

Aunt Lydia

Reasons to Swipe Right: She knows all the most influential high commanders. She has survived three separate purges of Gilead.

Reasons You Might Want to Swipe Left: She is very practiced with a cattle prod.

Follow Her on Instragram: @girlbossinbrown

Holden Caulfield

Reasons to Swipe Right: He is connected, as he knows young men from all the most prestigious families at Pencey Prep.  He is career oriented as he sees a future for himself keeping children from falling off a cliff. 

Reasons You Might Want to Swipe Left: He hates phonies so it might be hard to take him to Daddy’s Country Club. He might be unraveling.

 Follow Him on Instagram: @justacatcherintherye

Michael Valentine Smith

Reasons to Swipe Right: Being a human, who was raised by Martians and born of geniuses, he has superhuman strength and unmatched intelligence.  Also if you drink a glass of water with him he will consider you his brother which will afford you life-long protection and loyalty.

Reasons You Might Want to Swipe Left: He curls up in the fetal position and goes into a catatonic state anytime you challenge his understanding of the world. Also, almost anything challenges his understanding of the world.

Follow Him on Instagram @grokwithmeandtalkwithme

Hester Prynne

Reasons to Swipe Right: She is a woman who can provide for herself and her child.  She will only be with you if she wants to be with you, not because she needs you.

Why You Might Want to Swipe Left:  She seems kind of hung up on the town minster. Plus, you know, she has baggage.

Follow Her on Instagram @Aisforawesome

Wife of Bath

Reasons to Swipe Right: She has traveled the world several times. She has had five husbands and loves to tell a bawdy tale about those times.

Reasons to Swipe Left: She expects a lot from a partner after having had five husbands. She doesn’t need your money.  Also, high school English teachers won’t shut up about her.

Follow Her on Instagram @caterburyclotheshorse

Jaqen H’ghar

Reasons to Swipe Right: He is always changing his appearance and face so you never get bored with the same old thing.  Also he seems to have mastered death, which gives him a calmness about his life,.

Reasons You Might Want to Swipe Left: At restaurants, he always tries to pay the bill with a weird iron coin.  Then he tells the waiter that the next time he needs an uber he should say “Valar Morghulis” in his best High Valarian and give the driver the coin, and it will take him where he needs to go.

Follow Him on Instagram @amanisafacelessman01