I am currently in the process of filling out Preschool Nugget’s kindergarten registration form for next school year.
It’s been two years since I went through this process, when Mr. Man was preparing to enter kindergarten and this time around I am in a completely different mindset.
I did not know that this was an emotion that I would feel when kindergarten is potentially still 6 months away from Preschool Nugget.
When I was last going through this process, I filled out the forms with gusto. I was so excited to register Mr. Man for kindergarten. The year was 2021 and my local school district had just lifted their Covid protocol of having the students attended only two days a week in-person with the rest of the rest of the instruction being virtual. Kindergarten in my school district is still only half day, so the children who attended kindergarten the year before Mr. Man received extremely reduced in-person teaching. I was glad that Mr. Man would be receiving the full amount of half-day kindergarten that our school district provides in a normal year, non-Covid protocol year.
Not only was I grateful that Mr. Man would likely be having a “normal year”, I was also excited because Mr. Man seemed extremely ready for school. He has fall birthday, so he has the advantage of being on the older end of students in his class. He has also always been an extrovert so I knew that he was looking forward to meeting his new classmates and teacher. I could tell during his final year of preschool that he was unequivocally ready for kindergarten.
So in 2021, I filled out those kindergarten forms as quickly as possible with no reservations.
Filling out forms this time around has been a totally different animal for me though. Preschool Nugget is slightly younger for his grade age then Mr. Man was, but he is in a different place in my opinion in terms of readiness.
Mr. Man receives speech therapy, occupational therapy and a weekly visit from the preschool special education teacher in our intermediate unit. He has made a lot of progress over the last year especially since he started attending a new preschool that uses a Reggio Emilia teaching style this past fall. So we are happy he is flourishing. At times we can see him attending kindergarten in the fall and we feel hopeful about it. At other times though, it is harder to imagine.
My husband and I have spoken about our concerns with Preschool Nugget’s developmental pediatrician, preschool teachers, special education teacher, and speech therapist. Everyone seems to have a slightly different opinion. Some specialists have said “Yes, send him” but some have told me that we should definitely wait another year to give him language skills more time to develop.
Last fall, I read this article in the Atlantic which advocated for red-shirting, which means holding a child back from starting school so they have time to be more ready. After reading it, I was sure that red-shirting Preschool Nugget and giving him time to mature was the way to go.
Then last month, as his school parent-teacher conference and IEP meeting both sets of teachers highly encouraged us to challenge Preschool Nugget and register him to start kindergarten in the fall. His developmental pediatrician told us that he made progress this past school year because he was being challenged.
If he were small for his age or his birthday was in the summer instead of February, I believe that we would redshirt him in a heartbeat. However, he is very tall for his age and his birthday is only halfway through the school year so that makes this decision harder.
As of now, what Mr. Katie and I have decided is to continue on with the kindergarten application process. This spring he will be evaluated by the school district and it will be determined if and what extra speech and education resources he will qualify for from the school district. We have been informed that we can pull out of the application process at any point if we want to wait another year. So I understand that we have control over the situation and the privilege of being able to wait another year if we want to wait.
I just don’t want to make the wrong choice for Preschool Nugget. As I said before, he is very tall. He might stick out a little because of his height if he were held back. Also do not want him to stagnate if we wait another year to send him to school.
However, if we do send him to school and he isn’t ready, I worry that the other students will make fun of him. I worry that he will develop a low self esteem and think that he is not as good as other people if he cannot talk as well as they can. My parents always tried to teach me that I did not have to worry what other people thought of me, but still that did not stop me from feeling bad when I was a child and people were mean to me. Preschool Nugget reminds me a little of me. He seems to be a bit of late bloomer and I want to protect him. The world can be so mean sometimes. I was a poor student for my first few years of school but then I did much better later on. This could be the case with him. I know that this early struggle gave me some useful life skills like perseverance. Mr. Katie likes to remind me that it is better to struggle early in school when it counts less than later on when grades have more meaning. However, nobody likes to see their child struggle.
A word of note: This post is about me and my feelings. I do understand that generations before me, such as the Baby Boomers, had it very had with their extremely large class sizes and schools being unprepared for such a large generation. However, this post is about one parent’s nervousness regarding sending a child into a school in the 21st century where there is a different cultural attitude about what children should learn and when more is demanded of children at a younger age. I do understand that Preschool Nugget will most likely be fine either way, but I do feel some nervousness about weighing the future implications of our parental decisions while Preschool Nugget is still very young.
Thank you for reading!
Love you, Katie!
I feel your pain. I agree with Mr. Katie- continue with application, meet with school and if you decide the time just isn’t right, you can enroll him next year. I don’t see him often enough, but in the few times I’ve seen him this year- he seems to have made quite a few victories with his speech- It’s part of our nature to want to protect our kiddos from the big, bad, mean world, but many times, our children really surprise us with their resilience.
I get it. Its so hard to make decisions for your kids. And its so easy to worry about them. I’m glad you are giving yourself options. I think its a great idea to register him and have the school district evaluate him and see what their special education department will provide him with.